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My husband came out as trans after 11 years of marriage and is now my wife

My husband came out as trans after 11 years of marriage and is now my wife

Author Jess DeCourcy Hinds’s husband Stefan came out as a trans woman after over a decade of marriage. The two decided to stay together, and Stefan, now Stefanie became Jess’s wife. The two reveal that they are much happier now. 

Jess shared her story saying, “It has been almost a year now, and I’m no longer surprised by the changes in her physical appearance. She’s gorgeous, but I’m still in shock about the personality changes.”

She describes how Stefanie enjoys shopping for feminine clothing. “I was also surprised when she offered to push the toddler’s stroller so I could shop unencumbered,” Jess revealed. 

“I’d never heard of the expression ‘gender euphoria’ before my wife came out. The media loves to emphasize the negative sides of trans people’s lives, but the flip side of gender dysphoria, the euphoria- deserves attention too. 

“Stefanie’s coming out has improved both her life and our family life. Our children (two girls ages 9 and 2) barely blinked the first time they saw their father in a dress. But they’ve definitely noticed that Stefanie takes them to the zoo and trampoline park more.”

Jess reflects on a time when things weren’t so good for the couple. 

“For years, my husband had Googled transgender stories and medical transition without quite knowing why. He (she) repressed these desires out of fear of stigmatization and losing our marriage. The strain of secrecy burdened us both. Now we are both exhaling. 

Jess, who is bisexual, values nontraditional gender expressions. She had noticed her husband’s sensitivity but hadn’t seen any ‘typical’ signs of him (her) being trans until he (she) came out. 

She notes that Stefanie is happier too and says, “the music inside her finally became melodious. As her wife, I hear this music too. I can’t help but dance with her, even in the middle of a discount clothing store.”

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